No, not YOLO unfortunately...YOYO. Like the toy that goes up and down. That is how I'd describe the entry into this new decade of 2020. Extreme highs and lows. Highs of fun times with loved ones...some awesome travel (Read momcation!), but paired with some lows, which are creeping up way too often. It seems that 2020 is rough on many people (according to articles and memes I've seen) and we all had such high hopes! Are our expectations of life just too high? Is this just a crazy time to be alive like the 60s or when Britney Spears shaved her head? What is going on and how do we cope?
My expectations were definitely high for 2020 because this year also marks 10-years that I've been with my husband. The last decade was really amazing, with all of our big life events happening in the past ten years. I had hopes that this next decade would be even better and I'm not discounting it yet, but there's been some crazy crap that has happened so far in 2020. Let's just say I am not off to the greatest start...or when I think it's getting better, something happens to bring me back down. Is anyone else going through this?
So, trying to remember how 2010 started and being sentimental, back to when I first met my man, I dug into my email, to reread our early messages to each other. In the spirit of wanting to bring him back too, yesterday I forwarded some of the first emails we exchanged which were exactly ten years ago. I sent him a loving message forwarded with it, for him to read during the day. Of course he didn't respond back (shocker) and when I asked if he got my email over dinner, he said an unenthusiastic "Yeah." Ok...I said back..."Oh, you didn't respond" and he goes, "Yes I did. I texted you back that I needed an 'Explanation of Benefits' from the dental surgery you just had, so I can submit it to insurance." We both laughed. Wow...romantic. That describes our life so perfectly right now. This yoyo effect I'm going through of the high feeling of reading back on our early love notes (he was really romantic then!)...complimented by the low of the harsh reality that is our current life...when dental insurance claims are the priority instead of a sweet note back to your wife.
Right now is an especially stressful time, as I'm entering new chapters, trying to help my son navigate real school, and keep everything else going. I'm hopeful for a little bit more of a steady high period in 2020. Any time now universe...I'm ready.
If you are having a tough time in 2020 too, please share. Let's get through it together!!